Sunday, March 29, 2009
I did have fatigue this morning and took a looooong nap when it hit. But when I woke up I felt really good.
I still have the electrical shock sensation when I bend my head forward - but not as prominent as it has been.
None of the wretched burning sensation though - THANK GOODNESS!!! KNOCK ON WOOD!! :)
After Kate and I went to her GS event we picked up her Dad and Will and we went to see Monsters Vs. Aliens. It was awesome and we laughed out loud!
Go see it if you can!
Please take care everyone!!
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
I've been having painful things, fatigue and what not for the past couple of weeks. I had also started noticing, just a little - very slight, the electric shock feeling when I bend my neck forward. This weekend I just started noticing it more. It's not the feeling I had when I got diagnosed. That one would radiate down my left side, into my arm and fingers and down my leg to my toes.
This time it's more isolated to my back and when I'm sitting it moves from there to the top of my right thigh.
I've also had this horrid sharp burning pain that goes from the shoulder area up to the base of my head on the left side of my neck. And I feel it through my arms in places too. Like I will feel that feeling in a very, very dull form starting in my arms and shoulders and then it will go away. Then out of the blue I'll have that burning pain and it does me in. I feel exhausted after it. And sad.
I am very sad right now. I want this to go away. I want MS to go away. I hate MS.
I'm back on Neurontin in a progressive way so the fatigue side effect doesn't just lay me flat - not that the current fatigue isn't doing that already. The nurse wants me to try for 9 days to see how it goes. So in 9 days this will be over? In 9 days I'll have an idea if this was just a pain thing or a relapse? What's the difference between plaque on the spine and a lesion? :( I should know this by now.
I just am trying to get through today really. I need to. It's not been a good day at all. Well, or yesterday. Just really sad. This stuff always makes me really very sad.
I hope everyone else is a thousand times better than I am right now!
Please take care.
Saturday, March 14, 2009
But the big one is the title "Looking forward with Multiple Sclerosis".
When I first started this I'm fairly certain that I was saying I was looking forward to things even though I have MS.
I still am - but never really thought of all those things I'm looking forward to.
Here are a few things that I've been thinking of lately - but I've categorized them.
What I'm looking forward to in my life:
- My kids to stop fighting some day. Which they're doing now.
- My kids to fight intelligently - without the sticking out of the tongue.
- My kids to keep learning and doing so well in school.
- Will to start kindergarten this year.
- Kate to be that great big sister she has been and is becoming more of. Much more tolerant then before.
- Both of them to graduate from High School, then College!
- Both of them having families of their own. I really look forward to that. I'll be old - but I'll still be around. I really want to be.
- I really can't wait till I can pay off some bills.
- Looking forward to the economy improving - can't help adding that - it's a current worry.
- I want to get the beagle in agility classes - looking forward to her doing well at that. She's a smart puppy!
- Being able to spend time with my best friend.
- Being with my folks!
- Playing with the kids.
- having our team at work doing really, really well. :) Can't help that one either - it's a current want.
- Right now - I'm really looking forward to Sunny and 70!!
What I'm looking forward to if there is a cure or oral medication for MS:
- A cure!
- Not having to take shots! OMG - I can't even begin to express how much I'm looking forward to that. I mean - if I don't HAVE to take it - then I won't even have to feel the guilt of skipping when I sometimes do. :(
- Even if I still have MS - taking Oral medication instead of the shot.
- Have I mentioned - not having to take the shots?
- Being able to take a shower and when I wash my arms, thighs, hips, and stomach, not having to feel the painful bruises from the shots or the bumps.
- Not having grossly indented skin - worse then cellulite.
- Not being soooooooooooo fatigued all the time.
- Being able to wake up from a nights sleep and not feel like I need to go back to bed forever.
- Being happier.
- No more excruitiating sharp pains that come up my neck into my head.
- No more feeling numb or tingles in my fingers, hands, legs, middle of my back, thighs, heels, and even in my head - so weird - like my hair is standing up.
- No more feeling like someone's using a VooDoo doll with my name on it.
- I could go on and on.
What I'm looking forward to with MS:
- The 7th year my team participates in the MS Walk is this April - I'm looking forward to that and really hope we can make our goal.
- The next Webcast on dealing with symptoms and hearing about the latest research.
- Hearing about people who have had specific treatments for MS and are doing so much better.
- I'm looking forward to hearing that people who have visible disabilities with MS, that they can get a treatment that reverses MS. I heard about that and that would be lovely.
- I'm making these bracelets for my team members - in the MS Walk colors - I'm looking forward to giving those to the girls and I hope they like them.
- Looking forward to reading some of these blogs and hearing that people are feeling better.
That's about it in a nutshell. I could go on forever - but who has that much time? We're all so busy.
If anyone is still reading - I hope you like the new background and look of the site. I wanted something a bit more cheerful and there are these free blog backgrounds, so this one made me smile and I grabbed it.
Take care all!
Thanks for reading!