That Shocking Feeling

It's baaaaaaaccccckkkkk...... :(
I've been having painful things, fatigue and what not for the past couple of weeks. I had also started noticing, just a little - very slight, the electric shock feeling when I bend my neck forward. This weekend I just started noticing it more. It's not the feeling I had when I got diagnosed. That one would radiate down my left side, into my arm and fingers and down my leg to my toes.
This time it's more isolated to my back and when I'm sitting it moves from there to the top of my right thigh.
I've also had this horrid sharp burning pain that goes from the shoulder area up to the base of my head on the left side of my neck. And I feel it through my arms in places too. Like I will feel that feeling in a very, very dull form starting in my arms and shoulders and then it will go away. Then out of the blue I'll have that burning pain and it does me in. I feel exhausted after it. And sad.

I am very sad right now. I want this to go away. I want MS to go away. I hate MS.

I'm back on Neurontin in a progressive way so the fatigue side effect doesn't just lay me flat - not that the current fatigue isn't doing that already. The nurse wants me to try for 9 days to see how it goes. So in 9 days this will be over? In 9 days I'll have an idea if this was just a pain thing or a relapse? What's the difference between plaque on the spine and a lesion? :( I should know this by now.
I just am trying to get through today really. I need to. It's not been a good day at all. Well, or yesterday. Just really sad. This stuff always makes me really very sad.

I hope everyone else is a thousand times better than I am right now!
Please take care.